5 Amazing Firsts In Women's History (That Were Total Accidents)

5

The First American Woman To Win An Olympic Medal Never Knew That She Was In The Olympics

In Paris, the 1900 Olympic Games marked the second outing for the modern games and the first for female athletes. Margaret Abbott, an amateur golfer, seized victory, the first woman to win a gold medal for the United States, and one of the few women permitted to compete in events. It was an amazing accomplishment; the kind an athlete could spend the rest of their life being proud of ... Except for the fact that Abbott had no idea that she had won an Olympic event. 

No one did; it took decades for historians to sort it out. To Abbott, it was just another excursion to Paris to sight-see, study, and visit the World's Fair. On that day, walking around with her mom outside of Paris, she volunteered to enter the day's sporting events. No hoopla, no pomp, no Wheaties box, no book deal, nothing.  

You see, the French had kind of half-assed the whole thing. They didn't even refer to the event as "The Olympic Games" but Prix de la ville de Compiegne, which means exactly as much to you as it did to Abbott. In the French planners' defense, the Olympics were a sideshow to the World's Fair, so they had their hands full with that massive undertaking instead of correctly-branded Olympic merch. In fact, Abbott didn't even get a medal. In those days, all athletes got handed shitty porcelain bowls for trophies. But, hey, first-place is still first place. At least she could use it as a toilet. 

But, hey, at least she inspired an entire generation of Olympian woman golfers, right? Nope! The International Olympic Committee immediately dropped women's golf from the competitions for a hundred and sixteen years. So for over a century, Abbott was also the only woman gold-medal golfer and went from putting green to cemetery green without ever knowing her place in history.

4

The Earliest Published Book by A Female Author In The English Language Was Never Supposed To Be Seen By Another Human Being

Now known as Julian of Norwich, the writer of the misleadingly sexy-sounding Revelations of Divine Love established women's role in English literature. Though that'd be news to her, as she set her hopes on peacefully dying in obscurity. 

As an "anchoress," she elected to be bricked up in a tiny room to pray for the rest of her life, deemed dead for all intents and purposes. Priests would formally hold a mass for her as the cramped room was sealed shut, contact limited only those loitering about the tiny window -- a surprisingly popular practice back then. That's one way to get out of never having to deal with in-laws and landlords.

3

The Pioneering Female Film Director Got Her Big Break Only After Her Boss Almost Dropped Dead Two Days Before Filming

Stepping foot on the set of 1949's Not Wanted, no one on the crew could have anticipated it being the most pivotal film in women's cinematic history. Written Ida Lupino, the modestly-budgeted, social message flick should have been a quick and forgettable footnote.

2

Millions of Women's Lives Were Improved Overnight By A Single, Slimy, Philandering Huckster

Issac Singer is the most unlikely ally the women's rights movement ever had. Just disregard the part where he fathered over 20 kids with multiple women while simultaneously married to three of them.

1

The Soviets Sent The First Women Into Space Because The Guy In Charge Didn't Understand How Capitalism Worked

With the Soviets and the United States locked in an abstract proxy war of sorts, the intellectual prowess of each nation (or their kidnapped Nazi scientists) stood in for military shows of might. 

Learning that the US space program was performing medical tests on women, Nikolai Kamanin, the administrator of cosmonaut operations, sounded the alarm. Citing the "patriotic feelings of Soviet women in his journal" (and not at all to protect his career), Kamanin freaked out and rushed a class of women into training. Immediately a plan was drafted to recruit females to beat the Americans' lady-astronaut initiative. On June 16, 1963, sky-diver Valentina Tereshkova became the first female in space, and presumably, the first woman to pee on the sacred Russian bus tire.

None of the reports of an American woman astronaut program was true. Kamanin had misinterpreted a story that a doctor that worked for NASA offered the tests to some women. These tests were entirely privately funded and just so happened to be conducted by a part-time NASA doctor who served on an advisory board. Westerners grasped the distinction. However, Kamanin evidently didn't understand the concept of privately-owned business. 

Records show NASA had zero interest in female astronauts. Neither did the USSR, that is, until they got embarrassed that the US might overshadow them. Afterward, they continued not caring as no female cosmonauts were selected for two decades after Tereshkova's flight. 

Top image: Alexander Mokletsov/RIA Novosti Archive