Don’t Forget That the Olympics Snubbed Springfield Because of Bart Simpson’s Stand-Up Act

Don’t Forget That the Olympics Snubbed Springfield Because of Bart Simpson’s Stand-Up Act

Writer Quit ‘SNL’ After Show Made Her Feel She Was ‘Back in Middle School’

Writer Quit ‘SNL’ After Show Made Her Feel She Was ‘Back in Middle School’

32 of the Most Useless Things People Still Have Memorized

32 of the Most Useless Things People Still Have Memorized

Buzz Aldrin Did His Moon Walk in a Boot Full of Pee

Buzz Aldrin Did His Moon Walk in a Boot Full of Pee

Lucille Ball Yelled at the Studio Audience for Not Laughing at Desi Arnaz Jr.’s Sitcom Pilot

Lucille Ball Yelled at the Studio Audience for Not Laughing at Desi Arnaz Jr.’s Sitcom Pilot

33 Teachable Moments for Children That Hilariously Backfired on Adults

One of the most embarrassing parts of adulthood is being outsmarted by a child. While it’s encouraging to see the student become the teacher, you always hope it doesn’t happen at your expense. Like the Redditor who told their children that the lottery is “a tax on people that are bad at math,” and let one kid spend a few bucks on a Powerball ticket to “prove their point.” The child won a hundred bucks. 

Other Redditors have recalled the times they’ve looked like a fool in front of a pint-sizer, and one thing is very clear: Don’t give beer to a four-year-old to show them it tastes bad. Because they might like it.

33

pedantic_dullard • . 5y As good people, we taught our kids that littering isn't nice. As humans, we also let some curse words fly in front of them. We were at our city's 4th of July celebration when the oldest was 4. We were walking around and someone tossed their trash on the ground. Captain Litterbug flew into action, picked up the trash and yelled, Hey asshole, you dropped this, while tapping them on the butt. ... 607

32

cadomski . 5y Taught them to read early. My son could read by age 4, and my daughter by age 3. This leads to some unwanted conversations as they will read things over your shoulder when you aren't expecting it. Or even just signs on the road. You're going to fast, Daddy. It says 55 mph and you're going 70. ... 4.5k

31

BobSacramanto . 5y I tried the whole have your kids quote chores for pay and bid against one another. It's supposed to teach them about working for their money and not expecting handouts like an allowance. It turned into every time I asked them to do something I good how much will you pay me? ... 10k

30

anoem . 5y My nephew mispronounced the name of a certain kitchen appliance, so my sister broke it into syllables very distinctly for him, saying it's mi-cro-wave. My nephew nodded very seriously and replied It's your crow wave! ... 1.1k

29

wisteriahaze . 5y Nanny not a parent. 2yr old was refusing to wear her hat. It was hot. I told her if she didn't put her hat on she would have to wait in the car. She started walking away from me, 'Where are you going?' ...car' ... 13.2k

28

Turtelbob . 5y My parents taught me to call 911 when I saw somebody doing something illegal. I called the cops on the Wiggles movie I was watching when I was 5 because a clown stole a cake. Luckily the 911 operator realized I was young, my story didn't make sense because it was a kids movie, asked to talk to my mom before sending out cops. ... 22.6k

27

PM_BiscuitsAndGravy . . 5y I always tell my children that the lottery is a tax on people that are bad at math. I let my 8 year old spend a few hard earned dollars on a powerball ticket to prove it and he won $100. ... 916

26

[deleted] . 5y My aunt and uncle were trying to teach my cousin manners, and wanted him to address people as Mr and Mrs. They used each other as examples, and consequently were known as Mr. lannuccilli for ~ 2 months. One of the funniest moments of my life was hearing my uncle describe how in the middle of the night instead of 'dad' he started hearing 'Mr lannuccilli!' Cracks me up every time. ... 9.5k

25

dpbart . ! 5y They told me not to look at naked ladies on the internet at the age of 14 but I found a loophole by looking at naked guys ... 6.1k

24

Penya23 . 5y I taught them to stand up for what they believe in.... All of a sudden they believed veggies were the devil and bedtimes should be abolished. ... 19.4k

23

Shanisasha . 5y Told my children they should always have a good reason for what they want to do as a way to curb impulsive behavior. Am hearing about ALL THE REASONS constantly. ... 9.9k

22

drinkmoreshowerbeer . 5y My parents did the thing where they gave 4-year-old me a sip of Budweiser under the impression that I could say that it was yucky and then turn it into some lesson about not drinking Mommy and Daddy drinks, or whatever. I instead took a sip and said Mmm! Can I have one? The lesson that beer is good has lasted to adulthood. ... 5.3k

21

thatsunshinegal 5y Not a parent, but my in-laws love telling this story about my fiance. Не was resistant to potty training, and they eventually got him to start using the potty by telling him that he had to be out of pull-ups before a family trip to Disney World, because Mickey Mouse only sees big boys and girls. And also who wants to log a diaper bag around Disney? Anyway, it went great, they had a great trip... and the day after they got back, he took a shit in the living room. When asked, he said I don't gotta

20

mustard_fox . . 5y My daughter ran down the stairs so I sent her back up so she could walk down them properly. She promptly fell down the entire flight. ... 330

19

mollymuppet78 . 5y Told my children repeatedly that if I found anymore mess/ junk on their bedroom floor, I would be donating it to the thrift store. I told them they had 15 minutes to clean it up off the floor. Came back to find everything picked up, except they went into the kitchen cupboards and had put every food they didn't like in a nice neat pile right in the middle of the floor. ... 249

18

miseleigh 5y I've been teaching my kids that life isn't always fair. The tantrums when one is invited to a birthday party have been too much. It's been helping, some. Then I was playing tic tac toe with my youngest. She covered up the column she wanted to use to win. When I told her that cheating isn't fair and I didn't want to play if she was going to cheat, she reminded me - life isn't fair, momma. Touche, kiddo. ... 8k

17

relevant_tangent . . 5y Saw a clip on local news about a toddler saving her mom's life by calling 911 when she collapsed. Figured it was a good idea to teach my toddler 911. Had two cops at my door 5 minutes later. ... 17.9k

16

DONT_PM_ME_BREASTS . 5y My kids were begging for a pet. I don't want to take care of a pet, and I told them that they don't clean up after themselves without me hassling them, so why would they clean up after a pet without me hassling them. Told them if they could keep there room clean for 6 months without me telling them, they could get a pet. Youngest child proceeds to clean room, then move clothes and a sleeping bag into the hallway and lock his door so his room can't get dirty as he sleeps in the hallway. ...

15

Hartastic . 5y A friend of mine was trying to teach his son not to hit his daughter, so any time the son hit the daughter, he started hitting the son in the head. Not hard, but enough to hopefully jog some sense of empathy. Actual result: the son would cover his head with one hand and smack his sister with the other. ... 339

14

geekworking . 5y Told kids that if they were bad they would get coal in their stockings on Christmas. What's Coal?, they asked. Well it is a rock that you can light on fire. They now want coal. ... 178

13

berthejew e 5y Taught my now 16 year old to always compliment people who insulted you. We were in a Burlington Coat Factory in Michigan when my mother was shopping for a bathing suit to take to Florida. There were few to choose from, so she was complaining. My kid was 4. A woman trying on pants and said something rude to my mom who was asking my opinion and my daughter caught on that my mother was agitated. She squeezed out behind me and told the woman, Your teeth are such a pretty yellow!

12

ghode . 5y When I was about 2 years old my family was at a game in Angel's stadium. My mother went to the restroom and left me and my siblings with my dad. While he was busy watching I wandered off. When they eventually found me I was halfway around the stadium. A crowd had gathered to watch as a police officer held me out at arms length while I screamed call the police, this man is not my daddy over and over again. My parents had taught me stranger danger, but forgot to teach me what police look

11

[deleted] . 5y Not a parent, but as a child I noticed my sister was writing her name on the walls when she was drawing on them with crayon. Taking on the role of Helpful Big Sister, I informed her if she was going to graffiti things she shouldn't write her name and give herself away. A few weeks later, she was carving patterns into the wooden desk in the study and carved my name into it instead. ... 20k

10

Kinkzor 5y As the kid and not the dad...When I was 11 my father caught me smoking. As a punishment he made me finish the whole pack. I hated my first cigarette and had no intention of ever smoking again. But after smoking that pack I would try to hang out with the older kids and smoke with them because after all, my punishment wasnt as bad as the usual whoopin' and they found me funny to have around. I smoked until I was 37 or so. Yeah, my dad was an idiot and a jackass. ... 2.9k

9

chipdipper99 5y When my daughter was 10, she wanted to try out for a community theater version of Beauty and the Beast. She got nervous though, and almost backed out, because she was so sure she wasn't going to make it. My husband, who did some acting in high school, stepped in and said that he would also audition, even though he knew he was never going to make it. Не wanted to demonstrate to her that it's okay to audition for something that you don't think you're going to make. She ended up not only just making it, but

8

Nomad2k3 5y Told my 11 year old who was being bullied on the school bus to stand up for himself if his bullies started hitting him again. Honestly son, the only way to be rid of bullies is to show them you arnt scared, if they hit you again, punch him back and kick his head in. Just stand up to them and youll see. Few days later, police land at the door asking for my son as he was involved in an assaukt, a kid on the bus had kicked him so he turned aroind punched hom to the

7

dgmilo8085 5y I wanted to teach my son the value of money and work ethic because he kept wanting Robux... I decided it would be a great teaching moment, and a win-win opportunity as he was just getting to the age in which I think he should start doing chores around the house. Не really wanted to buy some skin or something, so I created a chore chart and gave each chore a value. We established a schedule and everything. It was working out majestically, every day without asking he was doing dishes, cleaning his room, picking up the dog

6

KyleRichXV . 5y One of my 5 year old twins was still having occasional accidents because she would get so caught up in playing/ doing something else that she just wouldn't go and would pee her pants. To combat this we would give her a special prize of some variety when she wouldn't have an accident. This, in turn, caused her twin sister to START having accidents so she could get prizes for not having accidents (even though she was fine on this front beforehand.) We had to rethink our methods. ... 37.3k

5

Monfo . 5y Not a parent but when I was around 12, my father suspected that I stayed up late playing videogames, even though I didn't. One night he went into my room and told me that I shouldn't play my Game Boy Advance past bedtime, because I needed to rest. That's when I realized I could play my Game Boy Advance past bedtime, and I've suffered from insomnia since then. ... 9.2k

4

anon_2326411 . 5y Not me but my dad teaching the nephew. Не hated smiling so in pictures my dad would tell him to say whiskey. When he tried cheese it wasn't the same. Anyway, at school the principle was taking a picture of the class and tells everyone to say cheeeeese! My nephew very loudly says WHISKEEEY. ... 10.6k

3

onyxandcake . 5y I used to let my son have Five Alive juice boxes in his lunches because it's a small amount and at least it has vitamin C. In the grocery store one day he starts asking for Kool Aid and I said no way because it's full of sugar. I pick up the Kool Aid and Five Alive to show him the nutritional data to prove my point... and discover that they have the same amount of vitamin с but the Kool-Aid has far less sugar. Now he gets the Kool Aid. ... 1.1k

2

adonisgq1 . . 5y Playing carnival/fair games is a waste of money. My son wanted to spend his $20 to win a Pikachu stuffed animal from his allowance that he saved up. WE told him he would be wasting his money and he would not win. Не spent $15.00 and won the biggest prize. ... 9.4k

1

catastrophichysteria . 5y My dad tried to implement the whole you MUST eat ALL the food on your plate in our house during meals. My mom was never a fan of that lesson, but my dad was stubborn so she just let it go. Well, one day my sibling had 2-3 bites of food left on their plate and was very clear that they were absolutely full and couldn't eat another bite. Dad wasnt having it and insisted they could not leave the table until all the food on their plate was gone. My sibling realized they werent going to

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