“We would fight all the time, and when you’re fighting with the person you’re dating, it’s never anything important. It’s never like, ‘No, this is the cause of slavery.’ It’s just the stupidest shit in the world. One day, my girlfriend and I were walking down the street, and we saw a girl walking down the street barefoot. She was holding her shoes in her hand, and my girlfriend was like, ‘Well, she’s dumb and drunk.’
“I was like, ‘Maybe her feet just hurt.’
“She’s like, ‘Why are you defending her?!?!’
“We fought for an hour and a half about a stranger we would never see again. And then, you ever fight so long you just end up fighting about the fight you’re having? The original argument’s over, you think you’re out of the woods, and then she’s like, ‘You know, I wish you wouldn’t get so frustrated when we fought.’
“‘You know, I wish you wouldn’t say crazy shit all the time.’ And you’re fighting for another two hours, and eventually it’s like the movie Inception: There’s a fight, within a fight, within a fight, and somewhere the two of you are in a van falling off a bridge in slow motion. And she’s like, ‘This is your fault!’
“And you’re like, ‘But you’re the one driving!’”