26 of the Funniest Tweets from Thursday, May 2, 2024

26 of the Funniest Tweets from Thursday, May 2, 2024

John Cleese Cries That He Had to Cut All His Favorite Racial Slurs From ‘Fawlty Towers: The Play’

John Cleese Cries That He Had to Cut All His Favorite Racial Slurs From ‘Fawlty Towers: The Play’

Brian Cox Starred in One of the Most Controversial Video Games Ever

Brian Cox Starred in One of the Most Controversial Video Games Ever

Isaac Hayes’ Son Believes That Chef Didn’t Quit ‘South Park’ — Scientology Forced Him Out

Isaac Hayes’ Son Believes That Chef Didn’t Quit ‘South Park’ — Scientology Forced Him Out

28 Random Bits of Trivia to Bench Press Into Your Brainpecs

28 Random Bits of Trivia to Bench Press Into Your Brainpecs

20 Things That Kill Your Ability To Deal With People, Part 1

It's taken a long time for the human race to become the apex species on our planet -- which is a shocking feat. Not because of the monsters we've had to outlive or the dangerous climate shifts we've had to survive.

No, it's shocking because, with so many pet peeves, we're lucky that we all haven't killed each other by now.

20

LOL! BRB If you lol or O 'tee tee why. el while speaking with me, we're done. Life isn't an internet chat rOOMo TTYL BTW CRACKED COM

19

OUR RELATIONSHIP WILL BE LICKED THE MOMENT I SEE YOU LICK A FINGER TO TURN A PAGE. CRACKED COM

18
Entry by Slammer13

If you start a sentence with the word Technically,.. I'll smile politely for the rest of our conversation, : but we technically won't be friends anymo

17

20 Things That Kill Your Ability To Deal With People, Part 1

16
Entry by Andrea Meno

If dogs gross you out, I'm sorry, but it's just not going to work. CRACKED.COM

15

I honestly don't care if you pick your nose. Who doesn't? Just don't do it In ront of me or we're done. CRACKEDCON

14
Entry by Kalli

UP YoU GET WHEN THE TABLE FROM PUSH AND DON'T IT IN, YOUR CHNR ME WANT MAKES XQU IN... To PUSH TRAIN.) OF A (|N FRONT

13
Entry by Golondrina

20 Things That Kill Your Ability To Deal With People, Part 1

12

IF YOU DEFINE YOURSELF BY ALWAYSDOING' THE OPPOSITE OF WHAT EVERYBODYI ELSE DOES, WE'RE GOINGTO HAVE THE OPPOSITE OF A LASTING RELATIONSHIP.

11
Entry by PookieJones

IF YOU TAPE MY DRUNKEN ANTICS, EVEN AS A JOKE BETWEEN FRIENDS, I'LL FIRST ASK YOU TO DELETE THE VIDEO, AND THEN MY PHONE NUMBER. CRACKED COM

10

IF YOU CAP OFF A MEAL BY DIGGING AROUND IN YOUR TEETH FOR FOOD AT THE TABLE, YOU CAN START DIGGING AROUND FOR SOMEONE ELSE TO EAT WITH. CRACKEDCOMT

9
Entry by PedroH

If you bring politics into EVERY conversation you have, PLEASE DON'T TALK TO ME. CRACKEDCOMT

8
Entry by Chan Teik Onn

CRACKED COM The second you start talking crap about someone else ] know behind his or her back, our friendship is over 1 can bet my -savings you have

7

C'mon... explain one more time in amazing detail how THIS is better than THIS CRAGN [or vice versa) 0000 And I' kick you out of my damn car!

6

If you don't use tissues then we've got issues. CRACKED COM

5

I'm more than happy to share my comics with you. CRACKED.OON But if you dog-ear even one Page you will be dead to me forever.

4

If you think a book is a stack of paper rather than the words in it, E-books? Nah. I only read real books. then don't expect me to take you seriousl

3
Entry by femshep87

If you can't GET OFF YOUR DAMN PHONE when we're together, we're not gonna be together long. CRACKED.COM

2
Entry by PookieJones

DO YOU WANT ME TO BE YOUR FRIEND? STOP WHISTLING THIS INSTANT. CRACKED COM

1
Entry by HamHurt

When everyone else only gets one slice and you get five, because... CRAGN you're that asshole who does this! No more pizza party invites for you.

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