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31 of the Funniest Tweets from Thursday, April 25, 2024

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Rob McElhenney Wants to Give the ‘Fallout’ Show An ‘It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia’ Spin

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Hero ‘Seinfeld’ Fan Finally Releases Script From Banned Episode ‘The Bet’

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20 Horrifying Sides Of Space Travel No One Talks About

Everyone's super psyched about launching the new Whatever The Hell Elon Musk/Jeff Bezos Calls It to the ISS, and who can blame them? We're all anxious for the future of space travel to get here, and we picture this as huge, comfortable starships hauling us to other planets where adventure awaits. To boldly go where people ain't never been before or whatever that sci-fi show said.

We assume the ships will have lasers, just in case they need to destroy other ships. We could discover a new alien species to trade and have wars with it. Or have machines in the ship that will make things for us, whatever we desire, again like that space show. I think it was Space Goers or something. 

But it's time for a dose of reality and revise our expectations.This is your reminder that even for your grandchildren, space travel will probably really, really suck.

20

AN UNANTICIPATED THREAT SHOOK NASA IN THE 1960s. SPACE FARTS. Farts don't really go away in zero-G because there's no convection. Floating bubbles of For details, read 6 Reasons Why Mass Space Travel Would Completely Suck

19

ROMANCE IS FORBIDDEN AMONG ASTRONAUTS. NASA SAYS COUPLES CAN'T SHARE A SHIP. The one exception was when the couple married right before launch, and itFor details, read 6 Reasons Space Travel Will Always Suck

18

MEN MUST PEE USING A FUNNEL. WOMEN MUST PEE USING A CUP. Pee's converted into drinking water, because up there, every drop of liquid counts. The real For details, read 6 Ways Movies Get Space Wrong (by Astronaut Chris Hadfield)

17

STEERING WHILE IN ORBIT IS CRAZY HARD. ACCELERATE? THAT RAISES YOUR ORBIT. To lower your orbit, you now need negative force from your rockets. But sinFor details, read 6 Reasons Life in Space Sucks (That Sci-Fi Doesn't Show You)

16

YOUR HEART WEAKENS IN SPACE. OVHD 0 YOUR ONLY REMEDY? CONSTANT EXERCISE. You have to exercise a good 2.5 hours a day, every day, as long as you're outFor details, read 6 Reasons Why Mass Space Travel Would Completely Suck

15

THIS RUSSIAN SOYUZ IS HOW WE REACH THE ISS. COK3 IT WAS DESIGNED IN 1962. Yeah, space tech can be ancient. The Soyuz remained unchanged for decades. IFor details, read 6 Reasons Life in Space Sucks (That Sci-Fi Doesn't Show You)

14

IN MOVIES, SHIPS TOUR COLORFUL NEBULAE. BUT SPACE IS ALMOST ENTIRELY EMPTY. You'll generally be looking out at nothing. Even if you stare right at oneFor details, read 6 Reasons Space Travel Will Always Suck

13

EVERY SPARE INCH IS USED FOR STORAGE. FUEL, FOOD, PARTS, MED SUPPLIES ... Those are the systems whose sharp comers you will continually be banging agaFor details, read 6 Reasons Space Travel Will Always Suck

12

IN SPACE, GERMS CHANGE WEIRDLY. YOUR IMMUNE SYSTEM, MEANWHILE, CRUMBLES. Meds and vaccines also lose potency in space. Oh, you didn't want to go throuFor details, read 6 Reasons Life in Space Sucks (That Sci-Fi Doesn't Show You)

11

SPACE DOES HAVE THE INTERNET. BUTIT'S SUPER SLOW. The issue is distance. While the ISS itself is only around 250 miles away, signals must bounce throuFor details, read 6 Reasons Why Mass Space Travel Would Completely Suck

10

LOW GRAVITY GIVES YOU SPACE DIABETES. 10 mnl NovoRapid Norcisk 100 j/ml HM tipkeni ruulinum roztok 100 abkutanni, aspartum m.j/mi wadani kci. intravenFor details, read 6 Reasons Life in Space Sucks (That Sci-Fi Doesn't Show You)

9

SPACE JETPACKS DON'T EXIST. THE CLOSEST THING WAS SCRAPPED. The one in Gravity is based on the Manned Maneuvering Unit, which dates back to 1984. Its For details, read 4 Things About Space Travel You're Picturing Totally Wrong

8

SPINAL DISKS CUSHION YOU AGAINST GRAVITY. IN SPACE, THESE BECOME USELESS. So your vertebrae drift and extend your spine. The good news: you get tallerFor details, read 6 Reasons Life in Space Sucks (That Sci-Fi Doesn't Show You)

7

SHUTTLES OF COURSE ALLOW NO BABIES. BUT LONG-TERM, HOW WOULD BABIES WORK? If we plan to travel long-term and also continue as a species, babies will bFor details, read 6 Reasons Why Mass Space Travel Would Completely Suck

6

RADIATION HITS YOUR RETINAS IN SPACE. THAT'S EVEN WHEN YOU CLOSE YOUREYES. This tricks your brain into thinking you're seeing lights, which goes from For details, read 6 Reasons Life in Space Sucks (That Sci-Fi Doesn't Show You)

5

ENGINE DIES ON EARTH? FRICTIONSTOPS YOU. IN SPACE? YOU KEEP MOVING, HELPLESS. Banking on a rescue? But any ship chasing you must first match your speeFor details, read 6 Reasons Space Travel Will Always Suck

4

SPACE RUINS YOUR ABILITY TO TASTE. SBNTEITMIDE u CPREAD Rese SOREA CHEES Cangy Com Peanus AHIMUMMUTUE 43020 4127303142 YOUR NOSE IS CONSTANTLY STUFFEDFor details, read 6 Reasons Life in Space Sucks (That Sci-Fi Doesn't Show You)

3

BONES AND MUSCLES ATROPHY IN SPACE. .ocutk RETURNING TO EARTH IS A HUGE ADJUSTMENT. You might be missing 8 percent of the bone across your hips, and tFor details, read 6 Ways Movies Get Space Wrong (by Astronaut Chris Hadfield)

2

INTERSTELLAR DISTANCES ARE HUGE. AT LIGHT SPEED, TRIPS'LL TAKE YEARS. To everyone on Earth, your time will slow down the faster you go. So that decadeFor details, read 6 Reasons Space Travel Will Always Suck

1

LET'S SAY SEX WERE ALLOWED IN SPACE. IT COULDSTILL BE IMPOSSIBLE Without gravity, blood moves to your upper body, messing with arousal for both men anFor details, read 6 Reasons Why Mass Space Travel Would Completely Suck

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