32 of the Funniest Tweets from Tuesday, April 30, 2024

Jinkies! A new live-action adaptation of Scooby-Doo is headed to Netflix. Berlanti Productions, the team responsible for teen soaps like Riverdale and the Chilling Adventures of Sabrina, is continuing their relationship with Warner Bros. Television for a reimagining of the series that brought us goofy teens solving crimes from behind the wheel of the Mystery Machine. While Mindy Kaling’s Velma most recently revisited the Hanna-Barbera classic, the amateur investigators haven’t been explored in a true live-action project since 2004’s Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed. Here’s hoping preeminent Shaggy Rogers expert Matthew Lillard will have some involvement in the project. 

Elsewhere, Jeff Bridges is returning to the Grid, but not without airing some grievances first. In news that’s since been confirmed by Walt Disney Pictures, The Big Lebowski actor took to the Film Comment podcast to announce that he’ll be reprising his role as Kevin Flynn in the next TRON sequel — TRON: Ares. It marks Bridges’ second return as Kevin after 2010’s TRON: Legacy, which featured some dubious de-aging tactics that Bridges wasn’t too fond of. “I didn’t like the way I looked in it,” he explained. “I felt like I looked more like Bill Maher than myself. It was kind of bizarre.” 

Meanwhile, hysterical posters old and new are flocking to the timeline to give us our daily dose of funny. Today’s most hilarious tweets include those about the perfect place to conceive a child on a Monday, a meal prepper who needs to start thinking about their last meal and an elf locked on a shelf. 

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bald ann tennis dowd @ali_... 22h ... heyyy!! sorry this is the death cab for cutie. but it you wait here for like 5 minutes the death cab for ugly should be right around the corner 5 272 2,299 65.1K

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Ben Gross @bengrossbg 19h ... The last time I wore my black turtleneck I was in the philosophy section of a bookstore and an old guy looked at me, asked German idealism? and before I could say anything saw the Hegel in my hands and said yeah, that figures then walked away. So I'm never wearing that again. 22 267 5,580 125K

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Pookie @PookiesParadise. 17h ... this is literally what dubai looks like jay @fwj6y 18h What Playstation console did you start on? SONY COOK 2 A 129 12.2K 207K 5.1M

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Drew Savicki @DrewSav 17h This is what Mr. Krabs would have done at Jan. 6 Crime Net @TRIGGERH....1 1d 30-40 hotdog vendors stormed Coachella after a fence toppled over CC 36 4,965 77.7K 2.5M

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alli @sonofalli 19h ... lost another friend today to half marathon training 67 988 18.3K 964K

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zeta @zeta_globin 11h ... 40yo introduced himself at a gathering as a painter and watched an art bro wax poetic to him about creating & the need to live in the city to feed off the energy for art before he asked whether the 40yo did abstract or realism & the confused 40yo clarified he paints apartments 35 243 5,973 del 158K

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Henpecked Hal @Henpecked... 22h ... My 8 year old asked if I'd seen his water bottle and I said it was next to the couch. Не started to walk off then paused and asked, the couch for sitting or the couch for laundry? and the accuracy of the question stung a little. 8 227 7,544 del 102K

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bitsy von muffling @DoctorPi... 13h ... Watching Anyone But You and the idea of making a bunch of people travel to Australia for a wedding is so fucked up that I can barely pay attention to the rest of what's happening 45 617 21.6K 731K

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Monica Venzke @monicavenzke 19h ... So she... no longer has a dog in this fight? NEW YORK POST New York Post @nypost. 22h Kristi Noem has 'no shot' as Trump's VP pick after puppy-killing controversy: sources trib.al/ AQWB1mu MIKEAMERICA GREAT AGAIN MN5815 36 617 15.2K 462K

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Bhald Bhaddie @teejslipko 14h ... me when two Trader Joe's employees bag my groceries together 7 1,827 27.7K 764K

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Tonja Renée Stidhum @Tonja... 14h ... Target's Circle card be like YAASSSSS REWARDS YOU GOT $.00000001 off this $50 purchase!!!!! SAVINGS! 67 4,861 38.8K del 810K

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Marcy G @BunAndLeggings - 1 15h ... I took my 6yo to softball practice and then realized it was canceled. My 6yo smiled at me, Well, look at that, we yelled at each other for nothing. 13 1,068 36.5K du 536K

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Rič. t @ihvamps 10h ... when your friends keep u grounded > НА НА bitch i love him Delivered girl shut the fuck up iMessage 135 3,378 14.7K 468K

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erica @ericanextdooor - 18h i'm doing intermittent bitching where i only bitch between the hours of 12 PM & 8 PM 32 2,253 15.3K del 510K

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$ Dan Toomey @dhtoomey 2h ... CE PRI $ weeping uncontrollably at skee ball because my nephew whiffed a five leg parlay and now I can't afford dental Evan @StockMKTNewz.3 3h DAVE & BUSTER'S TO ALLOW CUSTOMERS TO BET ON ARCADE GAMES Dave & Buster's $PLAY will begin letting loyalty members over the age of 18 place real money wagers on arcade games with friends through the company's app - CNBC 20 DE - C - 4 683 11.4K 405K

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Josh @PROTAGONE1L 12h ... dating apps aren't working anymore, i'm gonna start sitting next to couples at challengers screenings 9 C8 C7 C6 C5 C4 C3 C2 C1 9 D8 D7 D4 D3 D2 D1 10 E9 E8 E7 E6 ES E4 E3 E2 82 5,123 73.3K 1.6M

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Ric. + @ihvamps 10h when your friends keep u grounded> НА НА bitch i love him Delivered girl shut the fuck up Message 148 3,867 17.2K 542K

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Josh @PROTAGONE1L 13h dating apps aren't working anymore, i'm gonna start sitting next to couples at challengers screenings 9 C8 C7 C6 C5 C4 C3 C2 C1 9 D8 D7 D4 D3 D2 D1 10 E9 E8 E7 E6 ES E4 E3 E2 85 5,254 75.2K 1.6M

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$ Dan Toomey @dhtoomey 3h ... CE PRI $ weeping uncontrollably at skee ball because my nephew whiffed a five leg parlay and now I can't afford dental Evan @StockMKTNewz.3h DAVE & BUSTER'S TO ALLOW CUSTOMERS TO BET ON ARCADE GAMES Dave & Buster's $PLAY will begin letting loyalty members over the age of 18 place real money wagers on arcade games with friends through the company's app - CNBC 20 - - DE 5 962 15.6K 564K

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jame @kloogans . 15h ... you shouldn't let your cat jump on the counter my cat could take out a loan in my name if he wanted to 19 4,367 29.9K 741K

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Sierra La Puerta @SierraLaPuer 1d Mario trying on Princess Peach's bundles when she's away in another castle cc - 0:09 From MISTYGWIGS 38 2K 476K 21K

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the federalist stinks!!!! @rajandelman . 19h The floor under my bed: B-R PP PayPal PHX 7 I've never been swept a day in my life the ... I'll be damned if that happens. Bradley Beal on Suns going down 3-0 2 37 384 13K

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W Matthew @chillwaveguy 23h This gotta feel better than every drug combined sheryl lee ralph @thesherylralph - 1d I am the answer. L 14 15 16 E 17 18 19 E 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 31 29 30 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 53 52 55 57 54 56 58 59 61 60 62 63 64 Abbott Elementary actress Sheryl < > Ralph Q W E T R Y U I O P A S D F G H I K 1

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daddy bong legs @benduhqueen 21h ... why is my spotify horny daylist creamy bouncy morning 32 1.8K 21K 810K

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Jeremy Herbert @DDayFilms 1d there will be at least one human life created here THE GARFIELD MOVIE HOLLYWOOD SUITE ©2024 Columbia Tr star Marketing Group All Rights Reserved. EXCLUSIVELY IN THEATERS 9 102 855 27K

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jameecornelia @JameeCornelia 1d the Server and The hostess comin to the kitchen playing nice to me RIGHT before they ask me to cook them something Super Specific Time-consuming and inconvenient for their lunch break THE IMAGE @hollywoodporshe 1d me and my favorite со worker with 2 different personalities 154 16K 1.9K 941K

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Hideki Matsui Wife Drawing @nastysecretion 1d I saw room service shove an elf in here and lock it 8 836 11K 157K

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NONBINAIRY!! @fIyingfairies - 21h ... Automated jarvis...... clear my schedule. 18:26 Mon, 29 Apr Discord 18:26 women Sent a friend request. 28 6.6K 59K 761K

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Ranch Devereaux @theJacko 22h Having my annual physical today where l'll have to remind my gay judgmental doctor that I recreationally use party drugs What's your sexual orientation? Answers, please choose 1 Gay Bi/Pan Unfortunately straight Gay, but evil 40 99 2K 131K

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preston whaleiams @prestovision 1d I would add my parents being proud of me and ketchup DONEF What's For Dinner? @WHATSFORDINNER.2 2d You can only add two things. 2.3M 50 3.1K 43K

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MILKY WAY GHETTO @JayJurden 15h I would have let her in my apartment every day too. I understand Five Star Woman @bonyamericangrl - dd Ok.. 3 51 1K 43K

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Red da Redz @shes_rADIAnt - 13h You need to be locked up. AEthelred the UnPreddy @ready4preddy-16h Meal prepping some cheeseburgers for this week 204 103K 10K ils 5.1M