Woody Allen, Laugh Tracks and A Guy Who Makes Dog Armor: The Daily Nooner (EST)!

Awesome Video Of The Day Speechless Hollywood I get what United Hollywood is trying to get across with these spots, but I think watching Woody Allen sip coffee in a silent room for 22 minutes would actually be a pretty good show. If I were a television executive and somebody pitched that to me, I'd throw it on the air immediately. It'd be called That Woody! and it would generate billions of dollars in revenue, which I would use to finance a new gameshow where people get to keep all the money they can eat in one hour. I'd call that one Common Cents or GUTBUSTERZ! Can somebody please tell me why I don't have my own TV network already?

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Wildcard Week! The Pitbull Armory What could be more geektastic and/or esoteric than LARPing? How about designing armor made specifically for LARPers' dogs? "I love to make armor for women and animals but my goal is to provide people with zero to low maintenance armor that is lightweight and comfortable," this purveyor of custom-made "articulated pauldrons" says. "Are you tired of cleaning the rust off your mild steel armor and beating the dents out of it after every event? OF COURSE YOU ARE." Pathetic? Maybe a little bit, but these amazing pictures of armored dogs more than make up for any underlying sense of loneliness and desperation. Besides, what did YOU do over the weekend? Watch reruns of Everybody Loves Raymond and sleepwalk through a halfhearted masturbation session? Even if it's making suits of armor for full-grown adults and their dogs to run around and play-fight in, at least this guy has a hobby.