Wii sells like Hot Cakes. Ironically, Hot Cake sales continue their 40 year slide.

Here's our monthly look at the North American console and video game sales for October, courtesy of the NPD group. We should caution that none of the information contained within will validate your console buying decision, or invalidate that of your friends. Studies show that how well your chosen console has sold in a given month has little to no effect on the length of your penis* *(re: RFC 793 - Proposed measure for the value of an Internet user's arguments) Hardware Sales (lifetime in brackets) Wii 519K (5 million) Nintendo DS 458K (13.5 million) Xbox 360 366K (7.1 million) Playstation Portable 286K (8.9 million) PlayStation 2 184K (39.5 million) PlayStation 3 121K (2 million) Software Sales 360 Halo3 433.8K 360 Guitar Hero III 383.2K WII Guitar Hero III 286.3K PS2 Guitar Hero III (w. Guitar) 271.1K NDS Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass 262.8K WII Wii Play (w. Remote) 239.7K 360 The Orange Box 238.4K PS2 Guitar Hero III (no Guitar) 231.7K PS2 Fifa Soccer 08 129.7K NDS Brain Age 2 116.9K Xbox 360 sales dropped down from 527.8K last month, which suggests that the "Halo" effect has all but disappeared. Nevertheless, given its strong game library, the 360 should be positioned for a strong holiday season. That is, assuming it doesn't garner any more negative publicity about the

RROD problems - or worse. What are the odds of a 360 exploding and killing someone before Christmas? Probably not high. But also probably not zero. Measured on a weekly basis, the PS3 did a bit better than last month, though that's essentially the same as saying that it "sucked a bit less hard." Fact: PS3 sales are still hilariously low. However, these figures are from the period before Sony's latest round of cuts to the PS3's price and feature list, so Sony fanboys are hopeful sales might pick up yet. Nevertheless, at $399, the PS3 still represents the most expensive console available. If sales don't pick up soon, industry experts expect that by next summer Sony will have slashed the feature list down to the point where a PS3 is composed of little more than a Sixaxis tied to an egg carton with some yarn. As for everybody's favorite bowling and cow-riding simulator, the Wii climbed back up to the top of the hardware charts this month, despite having yet another soft month of software sales. What on earth are people doing with their Wii's? Aside from "not buying games for them." It kind of makes me wonder if everybody else knows something that I don't. Is there a hardcore porn Easter egg in the Weather Channel? I looked for weeks but the only thing I ended up with was a sore wrist. In software sales this month, the big news is the success of Guitar Hero III. GH3 sold very well across all platforms, including a healthy 286K units for the Wii, and a whopping 500K for the PS2 version(s.) This suggests to me that whether you play games in 480i or 1080p, the only thing that matters in the end is that you play them like a hurricane.