So, in the early morning hours, Mount Pelée did exactly what it was born to do, and it blew its damn load of Hot Pocket innards all over the place. But one of the wildest things, at least to my dumb ass, is what this eruption actually looked like. Conditioned to believe that every volcanic eruption just spews out a blanket of liquid magma that slowly rolls towards its destination and destroys everything in its path, this was somehow even more terrifying. The volcano tore open and spewed out a black cloud fifty miles wide, and a plume of ultra-hot gasses and debris rolled through. The volcanic gas and dust cruised in at around 100 miles an hour, and within just a minute, it had burned or suffocated some 30,000 residents on the island. Yes, you read both of those numbers right: one minute, 30,000. Number 30,001 was old drunken Ludger, kicking it at his volcano resort.
But, the anguish he felt within his cell was far from an easy ride. With his hot lil' studio apartment hitting temperatures of 1,000 degrees, he was badly burned by the extreme heat. Like a dad monitoring the thermostat in the summer, Ludger just sat there and took the heat like a goddamn boss and somehow survived the blast. Ludger, essentially, Honey, I Shrunk himself, headbutted the big round microwave door button, and hopped the hell in. In what has to be the single worst example of the dangers of drinking, Ludger was quite literally saved by being an absolute drunken asshole.
Four days later, rescuers heard cries coming from within the stone tomb and dug out the badly burned man. A man who was one of very few survivors and no doubt asked for a damn drink the second they pulled him out of there. What is even going through your head at that moment? You just rode out a volcano. A damn volcano that killed 30,000 people. You are, essentially, a god at that moment. I'm assuming this dude already had some sort of complex that made him get drunk and start fights and think he was the shit. Can you imagine what he's like now, hunched down at the bar, slurring over his bourbon as he snickers at the dude one stool over trying to impress a woman with the one time he caught a pretty big fish? Ludger is well within his rights now to crack a bottle over everyone's head and get on top of the bar and proclaim himself king of the island.