Man Offended By A Piece of Cotton, The Internet Has a Field Day

Bad news, friends -- the annoying trend of netizens getting their panties in a twist over dumb minutiae, like Harry Styles wearing a dress and, well, the existence of vaccines, has carried over into 2021, with a London-based radio host throwing an absolute conniption over an "obscene" drawing depicting *gasp* a piece of cotton attached to a string?

As the clock struck midnight on January 1, we not only celebrated the end of 2020 and the tangible potential of a Muppets Great Gatsby reboot, but the abolition of the U.K.'s value-added tax on period products. The move, which has been heralded as a win by gender equality advocates, came as a result of Brexit, as the European Union considers these types of hygiene materials as being "non-essential," the BBC reported. No longer beholden to these rules, the U.K. government decided to abolish this tax, which according to some estimates, will save tampon-users approximately $50 over the course of a lifetime. 

As advocates took to Twitter in celebration, writer Adam Garrie chimed in with his own message of support and a hyper-specific criticism of the celebratory post from Her Majesty's Treasury -- the inclusion of an illustrated tampon. 

"Good policy but is this obscene image really necessary?" he mused. 

His inquiry was likely a hypothetical jab at the government account's announcement, however, the internet did not hold back in giving him the answer to his burning question, asserting that the tampon sketch was, in fact, necessary. 

From calling out the absurdity of his post ...

... to asking him for his takes on toilet paper ...

... and even comparing him to a Dickensonian character ...

... Garrie didn't let the tweets get him down, consistently citing a sincere, pervasive disdain for "bodily fluids which originate from below the belt." However, in these ample explanations, Garrie also revealed another source of ire in his illustration-based crusade -- the tampon's "suggestive curvature" ...

... even drawing our his specific concern. 

Ok, then... Anyways, in the days since his fateful tweets, the internet has bestowed Garrie with the honorary title of  "tampon guy," a moniker akin to the ranks of air-fried hot dog guy and bean dad in the list of this year's main characters. 

So kids, remember, pay attention during health class or utilize the wonders of Google,  lest you face the wrath of Twitter, and are forever known as the dude who clutched their pearls at a drawing of cotton on a string. 

For more internet nonsense, follow Carly on Instagram @HuntressThompson_ and on Twitter @TennesAnyone.