One German forensic paper from the '90s tells the story of just how the bond between an owner and hamster can quickly change from heart-warming to heart-stopping. Officers found an unnamed 43-year-old owner lying dead in her own home. Her gown was hiked up to her stomach, leaving her naked from the waist down, while her face had gruesome lesions. Based on the scene and every Law & Order: SVU cold opening ever, investigators initially suspected that it was a rape and murder case and submitted the body for autopsy.
However, the autopsy revealed that the woman died of lobar pneumonia, which last time we checked isn't a registered sex-offender. In addition to that, the multiple tiny specks of dried blood on the woman's nightgown didn't fit with the botched scalping narrative that the severe lesions on her face originally suggested.
With the autopsy conflicting with the initial hypothesis, the officers in charge focused their attention on a smaller, fuzzier suspect -- the woman's free-range golden hamster. A quick inspection of the hamster's new nest revealed that it didn't stay with its owner's corpse out of loyalty. It was just a furry little Ed Gein; the nest was constructed with pieces of skin, hair, and muscle/fatty tissue. It had built itself a mini-palace using parts of its owner, mouthful by bloody mouthful.Â