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16 'Secret Menu' Items We Totally Wish Were Real

Every once in a while, somewhere on the Internet appears a "secret menu" for popular food chains that, while cool in theory, tend to leave us a little disappointed. It's usually up for debate whether or not these items are creative concoctions or just disgusting overindulgences, and they're almost always overpriced.

That's why we tasked our readers with giving these restaurants a culinary lesson by creating secret menu items that would actually be awesome. The winning submission is below, but first the runners-up ...

16
Entry by Sagar Parikh

CRACKEDOON EREUC COFFEE GAS STATION BLEND ONLY $2

15
Entry by bazooka

FLAVOR 32 B3R Daski toie WITH TOP LEVEL CLEARANCE ONLY SECRET CODE REQUIRED

14
Entry by TheBuzzard

16 'Secret Menu' Items We Totally Wish Were Real

13

CRACKEDCON ASK FOR THE STICK TO YOUR RIBEYE BISCUIT AT Hardees CHARBROILED THICKBURGERS

12
Entry by Sonny Time

CRACKEDCON SECRET MENU BURGER FRENCH FRIES KING Have them your way 1960s Recipe 1970s Recipe 1980s Recipe BURGER BURGER BURGER KING KING KING 1990s Re

11
Entry by Opus52

16 'Secret Menu' Items We Totally Wish Were Real

10

CRACKEDG COM KFC OTTTATE TRY OUR NEW DELICIOUS BONELESS. MEATLESS SKIN CRISPERS COmCUCENMA INEMA cae

9
Entry by Calvin Riedy

EXTRA VALUE MEALS EXTRA VALUE MEALS 1 WHOPPRJr. DOUBLE TRIPLE BOSSY DELUXE ON A RAFT, 4x4, ANIMAL-STYLE EXTRA SHINGLES WITH A with medium King Fries

8

16 'Secret Menu' Items We Totally Wish Were Real

6x0 7 M 2.. 3 McTots 3R2n 32n 32er 5 6 7 Go on, grab one. 32 7 8 9 2for$3 4 2 3R 2 10 11 12 DALE

6
Entry by Paka

16 'Secret Menu' Items We Totally Wish Were Real

5
Entry by Sonny Time

Big CRACKEDCON Boy The Atomic Wedgie Cheeseburger Ask your server about our Wet Willy Fries and swirlie Shakes.

4

CRACKED aud 188111 MegaFry!

3
Entry by ironical

sogood CRACKED co COM PIZZA FRIED KENTUCKY

2
Entry by Sonny Time

16 'Secret Menu' Items We Totally Wish Were Real

BREAKFAST The worid OokS better after a Denny's Loffee Doritos Grand Slam $14.80 Purekes e001 el bae syes of maole Stoner Slam $14.20 Fiter Coffee S3.

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Want in on this?

We are offering so many opportunities for you to win some dough that it'd be insane if you didn't get in on this. Aside from our photoplasties ($100 per contest) and GIFs ($150 per contest) we are paying out 10 winners for our macro contests. And YES, you can win all 10 spots ($350 payout) if you've got the skills to blow our minds that many times.