15 Jokes in Kids' Movies and Shows (That Completely Flew Over Our Younger Selves' Heads)

Baudelaire, Shakespeare, other famous writer folk we weren't assigned to read in high school English literature. (Browning?) All of the greats have some things in common – cool hair, good at words, and a propensity for some of the dirtiest jokes around. Writers have been including the filthiest types of jokes in even the highest class of places, slipping the shit among the roses like an abridged (and somehow worse) version of the Aristocrats. 

The Aristocrats: a family goes into a producer's office, looking to showcase their new act. Maybe America's Got Talent is right for them or something else, right? The son vomits straight in the wife's mouth, who pisses on the daughter, who takes a dump into the father's mouth, who slowly melts himself into a plastic liquid on the floor. Once the room is filled up and the producer is drowning, is the name revealed. The Duggars Family Extravaganza (for Christ) – or, the Reality Show Aristocrats.

Slipping well-known jokes into movies is a treasured pastime -- but an even more treasured one? Slipping dirty jokes into everything – into the canon of Western literature, on statues, even on ship head masts. Kids' movies and TV shows aren't safe from even the most deprived and depraved minds out there. Here are some of the darkest, weirdest, and filthiest jokes hidden in kids' cartoons, from Disney to Disney's next studio purchase, here are some of the weirdest jokes that you'll never figure out how they managed to sneak in.

15

Adult jokes in children's movies The spectacular spider-Man spider sperm After Spider-Man's web catches Black Cat's hand, she warns him in a flirting tone, You better not get your goop in my hair. CRACKED.COM

More: 5 Grossly Inappropriate Jokes Hidden in Children's Cartoons

14

Adult jokes in children's movies The Road to El Dorado That didn't involve his mouth. Chel and Tulio are presumably making out off camera - but then she definitely pops up from his waist. CRACKED.COM

More: 6 Movies Aimed At Kids (With Scenes That Definitely Weren't)

13

Adult jokes in children's movies Gumball Balloonjob The poor little balloon laments that he doesn't have the strength to inflate himself, guilting Gumball into... yes, blowing him. In a bathroom. CRACKED.COM

More: 7 Horrifying Things Snuck Into Famous Children's Cartoons

12

Adult jokes in children's movies DE-WORMING has never been this easy a de Port Behind You FOR COULDIT DE TIME 18 NET YOURSELE, FIXED? zootopia Get yourself fixed How are you going to pay your mortgage if you have a thousand kids? By getting fixed! Nip, tuck, Nick! CRACKED.COM

Source: Reddit

11

Adult jokes in children's movies shrek Farquaad's date with himself Farquaad is shirtless under his bedsheets, asking a visibly disgusted mirror to show him women. We don't need anyone to draw us a picture here. CRACKED.COM

More: 6 Movies Aimed At Kids (With Scenes That Definitely Weren't)

10

Adult jokes in children's movies R d BUMPER CIN REAR END FORMULA GAR 95 cars car boobs Two female Mazda cars run up to Lightning, tell him they are his greatest fans, and then show him their pop-up headlights. Yup, they're literally flashing him. 95 95 95 95 CRACKED.COM

More: 6 Movies Aimed At Kids (With Scenes That Definitely Weren't)

9

Adult jokes in children's movies Animaniacs LIPS No, no, no. Finger prints! Prince Jakko explains to Dot that she's supposed to look for prints, not Prince. The result is... well, dirtier than Dot is willing to get. I don't think so. CRACKED.COM

Source: Scene on YouTube

8

Adult jokes in children's movies Toy story 3 SPACE RANGER LIGHTTEAR The movie is about... the Holocaust? According to some people, the mistreatment of the toys in the daycare is an analogy for concentration camps. What does that make the evil bear? CRACKED.COM

More: 5 Creepy Cartoon Fan Theories That Make Way Too Much Sense

7

Adult jokes in children's movies Looney Tunes Yosemite sam In 1995's Carrotblanca, Looney Tunes got what it always lacked - a homophobic prison rape joke! CRACKED.COM

More: 5 Grossly Inappropriate Jokes Hidden in Children's Cartoons

6

Adult jokes in children's movies The New Batman Adventures she ain't talking 'bout bikes Harley Quinn asks the Joker: Don't you want to rev up your Harley? Vrooom, vrooom! Yes, she means what it sounds like. Mistah J isn't interested in the ride, though. CRACKED.COM

Source: Scene on YouTube

3

Adult jokes in children's movies wreck-It Ralph Tir One Game Fatality Mortal Kombat is kid-friendly now, it seems. D-ANON : C One Game at T CRACKED.COM

Source: Scene on YouTube

2

Adult jokes in children's movies The Hunchback of Notre Dame Pole dancing The (curiously all-male) audience goes wild when Esmeralda grabs a spear and uses it for a bodacious dance. Frollo gets so turned on that he's willing to burn the city to have her. CRACKED.COM

More: 6 Movies Aimed At Kids (With Scenes That Definitely Weren't)

1

Adult jokes in children's movies Arthur Anal probe Arthur recreated South Park's first episode, cutting right before the big bad alien anal probe part. CRACKED.COM

More: 5 Grossly Inappropriate Jokes Hidden in Children's Cartoons