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13 Hilarious Quotes From The Jackass Crew

From Johnny’s admiration for both snakes and bulls to what Chris Pontius really thinks about penises — please enjoy this list of some funny ass sh*t spoken by our favorite funny ass dudes.

13

COMEDY NERD Jackass Crew Quotes Snakes are like bulls. They're very cooperative. Johnny Knoxville CRACKED.COM

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COMEDY NERD Jackass Crew Quotes Once, we were filming on some remote island in Borneo, filming with an indigenous tribe. And one of the tribespeople pointed to my arm and said, Off-road tattoo! I can't even hide in Borneo, Indonesia! Steve-0 CRACKED.COM

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COMEDY NERD Jackass Crew Quotes Johnny Knoxville on filming Jackass Forever during the pandemic: It's funny to think about having all these safety protocols to go through just so we could do dangerous sh*t. It's like, 'OK, Madisor wear your mask until you get to the alligator pit and take it off and jump in. CRACKED.COM

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COMEDY NERD Jackass Crew Quotes Well, before we started doing this film, I told [director Jeff] Tremaine and Knoxville I said, 'I don't want to break my neck again'. I can't because I broke it twice already filming... and so instead we focused on my genitalia. Ehren 'Danger Ehren' McGhehey CRACKED.COM

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COMEDY NERD Jackass Crew Quotes I don't ever care to have skin graft surgery for third degree burns again. Steve-0 on his 2017 stunt that saw him make snow angels using burning jet fuel. CRACKED.COM

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COMEDY NERD Jackass Crew Quotes We realized early on that whatever you do, if you do it naked, it automatically makes it 10 times funnier. Nudity is just funny, and it's way underused for comedy...It's like almost like stripping into a superhero costume...It's like Superman putting on his outfit. Chris Pontius PARTY BOY CRACKED.COM

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COMEDY NERD Jackass Crew Quotes For the PTSD of filming to subside, it takes three years and eight months. Longtime Jackass director Jeff Tremaine CRACKED.COM

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COMEDY NERD Jackass Crew Quotes Preston Lacy on that time a pig ate an apple sticking out of his butt: I didn't think people would keep talking about me having (a) weird thing with a pig but they do... they keep talking. CRACKED.COM

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COMEDY NERD Jackass Crew Quotes Wee Man is magic. When he's on the scene, everything is magical. Не can do anything he wants. I'm pretty sure he could kill someone right in front of a cop and the cop would go, 'Oh, cool. Good job, Wee man!''' Dave England CRACKED.COM

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COMEDY NERD Jackass Crew Quotes For Jackass 3D, they made the mistake of scheduling three d*ck stunts in a row. The first one, they made like a balsa wood penis to wear over my penis, and they put this woodpecker on it, and they had the woodpecker try to peck through. And it hurt really bad when the pecker would hit my pecker. The beak went into my pee hole! Oh, God, it hurt so bad. Chris Pontius CRACKED.COM

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COMEDY NERD Jackass Crew Quotes 10 00 00 Penises are actually really tough. Chris Pontius CRACKED COM

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COMEDY NERD Jackass Crew Quotes I did wear a cup on this one, because I did not want that to happen. My thing has been through enough. Johnny Knoxville, referring to the Anaconda Ball Pit. CRACKED.COM

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COMEDY NERD Jackass Crew Quotes DO NOT DUMP IN POND The smell. It's horrendous. Dave England on behind-the-scenes Jackass things fans might be surprised to learn. CRACKED.COM

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