In this series, the gym teacher is having all the boys play baseball at recess. Calvin doesn’t care or know anything about baseball, but signs up to play to avoid being in a “cootie central.” When his dad tries to teach him to field, he gets a bloody nose. He gets bullied for not playing baseball, then bullied for playing wrong, then his teacher calls him a quitter. Finally, Hobbes suggests playing Calvinball.
The Lesson: Some things just aren’t for you.
There are things in life you are good at, right now. If you’re an accountant, you’re good with numbers. If you’re a sea captain, you’re good at reading nautical charts. I’m good at neither of those things, much like how I’m no good at baseball, much like Calvin in this series.
It may seem weird to call someone who spends every moment with their best friend a “loner,” but there’s a reason Calvin gets compared to the Fight Club narrator. Team sports aren’t often a conducive environment for loners. Baseball’s probably a good sport for a loner like Calvin because you often don’t have to talk to anyone or do anything. Problem is Calvin, like the 2022 Boston Red Sox, can’t even do any of the basic nothing that is asked of him on a baseball field. Throw in his pathological unwillingness to seek or accept help of any kind, and Calvin would’ve been way better off staying in Cootie Central. Organized sports aren’t for Calvin.
Obviously, especially at age six, it’s good to try things more than once to see if you just need to get the hang of it. But the absolute multitude of ways Calvin fails at baseball—fielding grounders and fly balls are basic fundamentals, switching fielding sides in an inning is simply baseball—shows that it’s probably not going to work out. That’s fine! There’s always Calvinball! And in Calvinball, you get to wear masks and make up the rules. So Calvin will be okay. But man, what a brutal series of events.