6
Quarantined with Father-in-Law: A Forbidden Father-in-Law Pregnancy Fantasy
"It was day three of the quarantine of the Coronavirus pandemic," wordsmith Ava L. Lovelace informs us, and our heroine, Reese, is sick of her loutish husband. All he's done is play video games, and ... wait, it's only been three days? Lady, quarantine is not the cause of your failed marriage. Reese storms out, responding to her useless husband's responsible declaration of concern for public health with "Fuck the government," and drives to the family cabin.
There she runs into her father-in-law, Oliver, who was driven out of his home by a nagging shrew of a wife who kept wanting to watch the news. Fellas, don't you hate it when chicks stay informed on current events? They're always yapping about how developments abroad will impact federal interest rate adjustments! Upon discovering that Reese is also at the cabin, Oliver secretly masturbates with her underwear before he even says hello. Hey, if there's one thing I know about women, it's that they love it when men three decades their senior get surreptitiously "possessed" by the scent of their laundry... "hemper"? Dammit, Lovelace, you're ruining the immersion! How am I supposed to enjoy the image of an old man cranking one out when I'm distracted by typos?
Over the coming days, pun unfortunately intended, Reese and Oliver settle into a routine of making dinner, watching Netflix, drinking wine, complaining about their spouses, and falling in love. Now, I think you see what forbidden fantasy is unfolding here: these people broke quarantine and are selfishly enjoying the benefits! I know we'd all love to be out there seducing our in-laws, but people could get hurt. Reese "[feeling] the extent of his ball sack" as Oliver impregnates her with the child she's long yearned for is all well and good, but what other fluids are they exchanging? And what about all the people they encountered while buying the supplies meant to last them months?
While I'm sure it would have been difficult for Oliver to resist a woman who is "hot and sexy as hell," the two attributes that make up a complete package, there's nothing sexy about irresponsibility. And not to judge their personal lives but, once the thrill of the romance wears off, Reese is going to have a hell of a time raising a child whose adult half-brother was once married to his mom. Oliver and Reese's careers aren't mentioned, but I hope they're making enough to afford a good therapist. This is why you should just stay home and read a nice new book.
5
Trapped in His Tentacles: Quarantined with a Monster
Now this is what I'm talking about. When Lily's boyfriend scoffs at the governor's quarantine order and continues to host parties, even after Lily tells him that her asthma makes COVID extra dangerous to her, she doesn't hesitate to dump that asshole. She also rejects the option of a comfortable stay with her mother because of mom's pre-existing condition, instead deciding to isolate in the spare room of her boss, Harold. See, this is a protagonist I can get behind.